Thursday, April 24, 2008

Girls, Uncle Sam wants you!

The Marines want me! I just read they are desperately seeking "a few good women". Wow, I could stand a career change . I look good in blue, although I'd prefer black. It might, however, be time for a new color and uniform. Who should I call about this? Maybe Calvin Klein or Stella McCartney could design something tasty. "Join the Marines and if you survive you get to keep the clothes". I like it. It's tempting isn't it? I can hardly afford anything at Neimans anymore. Apparently, they are trying to appeal to female athletes, as they would be more likely to make it through boot camp with the boys. Kind of like boy/girl after school sports right? This really peaks my interest. I loved beating the boys. I hope there's ice skating as I'd whip everyone's ass in a race.

I'm a little concerned about the accommodations. I'm vehement about bedding. Oh and towels. I can't sleep on a thread count lower than 380 and must, must, must have a queen size bed. I'm assuming I can bring my own pillows. I take them on all my sleep-overs. I also insist on bath sheets, as I hate skimpy little towels after I shower. Whoops, I almost forgot, and this is a biggie, I won't share a bathroom. Who can stand someone in your way at the sink, or all their "stuff" around when you put on make-up? Besides it's my reading room/library, I need solitude. I am however, very excited about the prospect of a communal dining experience. I love good conversation at meals. I do hope there's a cocktail hour as it's such a nice way to relax and socialize at the end of a hectic day. Btw, I'm not a picky eater so you won't find me complaining about the food like some people. Just please no Mexican, Chinese, or Indian cuisine. And for that matter I never touch anything fried, or prepared in corn oil. I don't eat meat either.

Ok, ok, no one wants me, not even the Marines. If they want you however, don't go, even if you get to keep the clothes!

1 comment:

Dr. Ruth formally known as Viking Jen said...

20 years ago, when I was a "spring Chicken" and a sexy tomboy I thought about enlisting in any of the armed forces. I discussed it with my friends and they said "You HATE guns and violence" and I said, "I love men or women in uniform" "Yes but you are against guns and violence" So I decided to date a police officer. Uniforms are hot! It turned out that the cop carried a gun and brought it to my apartment on what the cop said it was a “hot date”. That's when I decided to get into softball and soccer. Better legs, better uniforms, and no guns, just balls, lots of balls.

This days if anyone wants to join any of the armed forces it's like saying "I am enlisting, I want George W Bush to be my Chief. OY VEI! No thanks...Nothing against our soldiers, I admire them but it's not for me.