Girls, girls, girls, why didn't anyone let me in on this? It can't be a secret if I read the news in the New York Times. I feel totally left out to say nothing of realizing I'm the world's biggest prude. Apparently women are shopping up a storm and not just at Target, where yours truly is staked out waiting for the latest shipment of $20 dresses. While I'm trying on cheap clothes the rest of you are buying high priced sex toys. Is this true? Nice! And huh? Ixnay to designer handbags and hello to the "We-Vibe"! Yep, women are splurging on pulsating rubber duckies, vibrating lipstick tubes, jewel-tone fur ticklers, pulsing cigars that turn into pendants and pearl wrist restraints that double as necklaces. ( I love nice jewelry). Rock and roll girls. I say spend that rebate check! Hank Paulson, did you know this?
At least one industry in the country is booming AND wouldn't this be a much better way to lead off the evening news? Instead of hearing the auto companies bitch and moan and brokerage houses crying for bigger bail-outs how about, "Sex toy sales are up 50% from this time last year". Or "Sweden today reported a run on the "Gigi", a rose-colored rechargeable vibrator and the "Nea" a palm sized massager". Wouldn't that be a national pick-me-up?
Btw, President Bush, Alan Greenspan et al, this is what I call a stimulus package.
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I heard on the news several weeks ago that the porn industry is in trouble and has appealed to be included in the next $350 Billion stimulus package. You need to get your New York Times information checked out. Try Snopes.
I think its all a great way to spend more time at home doing things with the family instead of spending all of that money in movie theaters, clubs and swinging. Besides, the use of toys like a nice way to bring the kids into the process.
I had to think on how to respond to this one, after all you and I are related. And then I realized that you are the one that started this blog so I put my thoughts into my keyboard and go for it.
The sex industry will never be in recession that's for sure, that and potheads; they just make someone way too rich, rich enough to get a dress for more than $20.00 darling. So when it comes to toys, well yeah! What's new? Have you been to a good toyshop recently? The "pulsing cigars that turn into pendants and pearl wrist restraints that double as necklaces" they have them in all kinds of colors, materials, even pure leather. You want one?
SUGGESTION this is way too funny. Ready? Go to any sex toy website, here is one www.goodvibrations.com (they are in San Francisco) once you are there, check the vibrators and here is the funny part. Read the name AND the description of any one the toys, it will crack you up (pardon the pun)...
WARNING! When traveling by air and due to high security and check points, I HIGHLY suggest you DO NOT pack your “toy” of any kind/shape/form in your carry on bag, why? Because it goes through a scanner, do you hear me? A scanner people! And if it looks like a weapon of mass destruction, a gun or a home-made rocket they will pull you over, ask you to open your bag, they then lift the first two neatly folded jeans and BAM! Heeeeeres Johnny!!!! Have you ever seen a black man blush? I did, poor guy, he gets paid to make sure we all fly secure and he had to meet my friend Johnny. It made my day and yes I had 4 “stiff” drinks on the flight. On my way back, Johnny was hiding in the big luggage, and even though I was afraid that someone would steal it, my girlfriend assured me that no one would steal a used sex toy.. I agreed. I wouldn’t would you? Ok Rule number 2, DON’T BUY TOYS FROM craigslist or eBay, this time you REALLY don’t know where they have been.
And that’s my input when it comes to “toys”. Like the song says “I don’t want to grow up, I am a toys r us kind of woman”. Believe me, it does great things for each and every “stimulus package” or are we talking about a different package.
ENJOY THE VIBES BABE
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