I'm becoming a hermit! This is a disturbing thought. Are there clinical symptoms I should be aware of? Oh my God, don't most hermits have beards? Whew, back from the mirror, no beard but I need a haircut. I just heard on the "Kathy and Judy" radio show long hair is out , out, out, for older women. Perhaps this is a sign of a hermetic life. Crap, I bet my skirts are too short also. I desperately searched my apartment for "Vogue" or "Bazaar" to double check hemlines for Summer. I found myself anxiously flipping through an "Art in America" which wasn't helpful, but I realized I can skip the Whitney Biennial. I need to get out more, but my hair's too long and my skirts too short. "Kathy, Judy, help me"! Have I lost track of time sitting here at my computer?
I'm a computer hermit! Maybe we all are. I hope that means no beard. Hey, if you're reading this you're on a computer. I could "rest my case" but then I'd have to go somewhere. And who has to go out when you can buy everything from refrigerators to tires to vibrators on-line. To say nothing of the porn that one of my male friends watches all day. "Cut that out already"! Gross. I strongly suggest he gets off his ass and leaves the house. I can even shop for dates on line and never have to go on one. It takes hours, days, weeks to get through all the profiles on Match.com or JDate; a real time filler. Then there's the subsequent emailing and calling...what could be easier/better than a man I never have to meet?
I used to have a life. I remember getting dressed in the morning. Do they still deliver the newspaper to your door? How much are stamps these days? I confess I love googling my ailments, but I wonder if my doctor misses me? Wow, "google" is a verb! As for conversation, so 20th century... send me an email and I'll get back to you.
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