Thank God Olympic swimming is over. I'm exhausted. At last the American swim team can put their clothes back on and hopefully I will stop dreaming about them. "Bye bye boys you were hot, hot, hot...oh yea and really great swimmers". Now I can focus on the question I've been asked a lot recently. "Has anyone seen Dick Cheney"? Wow, come to think of it, "No". Where does that guy go? Is he hiding again or just shy? I saw the President at the opening ceremonies of the Olympics but unless Dick was dressed as a Chinese drummer I don't think he was there. Truthfully, I've seen more of Michael Phelps' mother lately than our Vice President. Wait a sec, I bet he snuck off and is watching women's beach volleyball. Dick, you naughty boy. Be careful though, and don't ask John Edwards for advice about women.
He must be off somewhere running the country since President Bush was busy giving high fives to the American men's basketball team. Uh oh, I hope he's not causing trouble because no sooner had the Olympics started than there was a surprising skirmish between Russia and Georgia. (Just a quick aside, aren't there too many new names on the map? Whatever became of the Belgian Congo and Yugoslavia? Sixth grade geography right down the drain). I sure hope our V.P. isn't trying to re-ignite the Cold War. I don't think I'm agile enough to hide under my desk with my head between my legs anymore. And can someone FINALLY tell me how that was going to save me from a nuclear attack?
Honestly I don't know where to look for him. He could be busy packing boxes for the big move. And I suggest only using book boxes as they are so much easier to lift . If he finishes soon could he be dismissed early? I'm not too busy, I'd be happy to help.
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4 comments:
Ok Prima, you made me laugh! Too funny...Yeah! Where the heck is Dick? I don't think he was dressed as a Chinese drummer, OH NO! He is probably hunting somewhere with a Chinese drummer...And what a body that guy has ha? Not Dick Chaney, Michael Phelps short legs, long torso, arms the span of 6"8' long, huge feet etc. etc. etc.
Who the hell missed Georgia on the schoolbooks? Maybe Georgia wasn't in their minds back then... Georgia oh Georgiaaaaa your have Russia up your A*...
FYI: Nothing you do will save you from a nuclear attack but if you do see Dick Chaney then your should duck under your desk with your head between your legs. Chaney carries a gun and doesn't know how to shoot. DUCK DICK! DUCK!
Michael Phelps- Wow! Hot hot hot man! Those arms. That body. He is like a dolphin…I want to go play with dolphins now. MICHAEL WHERE ARE YOU!
Doesn't everyone know that Dick, like other Dicks before him is just being a Dick! What more do you expect?
Yugoslavia was a forced union of Serbia, Croatia etc held together by the powerful Marshall Tito. Essentially when he died it died. The Belgian Congo has been the Democratic Republic of the Congo for some time. Hiding under a desk with your head between your legs might save your life but fellow students will not be so lucky. They will die laughing from what you look like. I'm sorry but Dick Cheney may not leave early until he finished the project he assigned himself - starting the Cold War again. When he is finished your taxes will not only go to care for people who would just as soon rob you and kill you as thank you - but also to blow the entire planet out of the Universe. BUT, for what it's worth he was seen lurking outside the Kremlin, dressed as a chinese drummer with a pocket full of fire crackers waiting for his chance to start trouble.
Thank God there is something funny and well written on the web. Keep it up.
Morrie
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