Happy birthday to me, happy birthday to me, happy birthday dear me, happy birthday to me. Crap.
Celebrating my birthday in the emergency room sucked. A big fat hairy blond put me there. She was just a little too anxious to eat. "Hold on there fatty, you're gonna get food." If only I had a chance to say that. "Let me just step out of your way." Didn't have a chance to say or do that either. POW, right into the wall she shoved me, head first. And how did I go from standing to kneeling with my forehead smashed into the side of the barn so damn fast. Yep, Ginger the evil fat mare nailed me. She sure was anxious to beat me and her pasture mate to the feed tub. No birthday cake for her. I leaped to my feet just to be sure I could. Well that was the good news, although walking a straight line would have been a challenge. Crying was a good option right after I stopped swearing. Luckily I had my cell phone handy and could make out the numbers. Ambulance? Friend? Ambulance? Friend? Or should I just sit down under a tree and sob? Ambulance seemed so serious and even though I felt my injury was just that I was trying to avoid reality.
"Dan, come quick, the fat mare got me." With ice packs on my neck and head we hightailed it to the emergency room. Trust me, this was not a "destination" birthday. I did however thank everyone in the ER for celebrating with me and it was a good gag until the nurse in the CAT scan room spoke the real truth "this really sucks." Yes siree it sure did. The ER doc couldn't have been nicer or cuter, but too young for this birthday girl. The neck brace was a necessary touch but a bad bad fashion accessory. Dan and I watched the pathetic Bears game on the very nice flat screen TV they had in the ER cubicle. I highly recommend this hospital. As much as I enjoyed the accommodations I was a wreck waiting for the results of the CAT scan. Dan, ever the optimist was optimistic. I'm cursed with the "oy" gene and was nervous and sweaty. Some party. In what seemed like 15 hours but in fact was 45 minutes the nurse came in took off the cervical collar and gave me my birthday news, no concussion, and no neck fracture. I loved her. The doctor came and said good-bye. He was so cute, but I felt so old.
Under the circumstances my birthday had a happy ending. Oh except for the multi-colored eye which magically appeared two days later and is still with me. My predominately black wardrobe sets it off nicely however and my bangs cover the lump on my forehead. I accept late presents/cards for up to a year.
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Well Hell I am well behind when it comes to your blog. I did send you a happy birthday wish on FB but I didn't know you were necking with a horse lol... Poor Gail, your birthday in a hospital but honey that's exactly how this all started. Look at in this way, when you were born you were in a hospital and came out of the hospital into this shocking world, ok so the cute doctor that took care of you this time was not even born then but that's another story. See? Life is that way, take it from me, I am younger than you, I know this things because I learn from older people (lol) one birthday yo' mama gets knocked out so you are born and "few" years later you get knocked out by a horse. Now, tell me how darling is that?.
I am sure by now the multi-colored eye is back to normal and you can be happy picking up your wardrobe for the holidays.
Happy birthday again and next time stay home till it's time to party on your birthday.
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