My mother is not a drug abuser. Unless you count Metamucil, Senokot, oh and the newest addition Konsyl. Wow Mom's pretty constipated... but not drug addicted. Btw she'd love to discuss this with you, so give her a call and get me off the hook. Please! It's not Mom with a drug problem , it's the Baby Boomer women. According to The National Institute on Drug Abuse we are becoming a disturbingly large group of druggies. Generation X, your Moms are in re-hab! Whoa girls, slow down... apparently you're not playing with our old hippy drugs like LSD, pot, and hash, but methamphetamines, crack cocaine and opiates. They will fuck you up!
What happened to us ex-hippy chicks? For starters we've had to become men, which is not what my Girl Scout leader meant when she said "be prepared". She should have qualified the sentence. "Girls, be prepared to have a high paying career, get married, have children, give up career, go through a hideous emotionally devastating divorce, share the children but not the money, hope you can get re-hired in the work force without Botox or a face lift to make you look younger, and remain in a good mood. Pass the pipe.
Get it National Institute on Drug Abuse?! Getting through the day and our lives isn't easy. This is why we've become an ever rising statistic. I like to drink. It's a big help. Red wine at 5:00p.m. and Metamucil at 10:00. I don't need to talk about it however, so don't call me.
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