Happy 45th Birthday Ken doll! Welcome to middle age plastic guy. Time sure does fly. I couldn't celebrate Barbie's big 50 and ignore your day. And kudos to Barbie for being "cutting edge" and dating a younger man way before it was hip. Hot damn girl you were a "cougar". Right on Blondie! Although truthfully, Ken was never my type. Bad bad clothes and although I desperately wanted to be a cheerleader ...I never wanted to date one. No megaphone boys for me. He also orginally had felt hair which fell off when wet. "Oh my God... Ken, your hair's at the bottom of the pool"! Gross. That must have been a big turn-off for our little Barbie in her itsy bitsy bikini. I know I would have dumped him after I stopped screaming.
Btw, did anyone know the plastic fantastic duo broke up in 2004? What could possibly have split them up, they seemed so perfect. Was Ken in full "mid-life" crisis? Poor Barbie wasn't a young hottie anymore? Ken, wake up you dope, she still had perky breasts, and a great colorist, unlike me. Did plastic boy buy a Porsche and start wearing Euro - trash clothing from Barneys while our girl was training hard to be an Astronaut , Nanny and Olympian? Don't fret Blondie there's always GI Joe. He must be out of the Armed Forces by now and have a very nice pension. Hopefully he's purchased some civilian outfits.
I'm guessing Joe's ditched the camoflage clothes and has flat abs. As for Ken....cheerleaders never age well.
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Ok here is the story... GI Joe and Ken are gay. GI Joe got kicked out of the Armed Forces and Ken got fired from his job as a Bell Boy at one of the major hotels in Broadway. Ken bumped into GI Joe at a local art deco restaurant on Ventura Beach and BAM! They've been together since then... Barbie still hangs with both of them; after all gay men make really great friends and the bitch is filthy rich (Barbie that is)... Ken helped Barbie decorate her last house in Malibu and it looks FABULOUS darling! In 2010 Ken and Joe will have their Commitment Ceremony in Los Angeles and the witnesses will be Raggedy Ann and Andy, Potato head, Gumby and Pokey and the Smurffs. So now you know. Any more questions please ask Mattel
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