Don't grow old with me,

Crap, it's time to choose between the happiness derived from a sugar high and living to 120. Now that's a tough decision and not to be made lightly or hopped up on a double mocha latte. If it's longevity you desire, "Put the Snickers down and step away from the candy machine". Dr. Ahmet Oz, Oprah's medical guru, says there's a way to be old, older, oldest. The key according to the Doc ; calorie restriction! Ixnay to the warm cuddly feeling a Twinkie provides. Want something sweet, chew on a sweet potato. Yummy, bring on the legumes and watch your 90's fly by.

Personally I don't mind the fruits and vegetables required or the paltry 1,500 calories a day, as when I'm not eating tiny Mounds bars I'm consuming pounds of produce. The real question for me is ....why, why, why would I want to be 120?!?!?! Correct me if I'm wrong but, does that sound like fun? And what WOULD fun be for a 120 year old cranky spoiled Jewish Princess? Lord knows, I'd probably look like crap and regret not having my face lifted at 100. I doubt I could wear my fab high heels for fear of falling or my little black strapless clingy dress for fear of scaring people. And for all you boys and girls who think I complain a lot now....OY! Clearly I'd have no friends and multiple restraining orders issued against me. Wow, good times huh?

Can you imagine what it would be like sitting around with fellow 120 year olds or those upstart kids in their late 90s!? What would we talk about?
Not sex . ... the visuals would be way too disturbing. Prune juice vs. Metamucil? I know this is a favorite subject of my 90 yr. old mother. Dr. Oz.... pass the Twinkies please.