Thursday, March 19, 2020

Love in the Time of the Corona Virus 

Social distancing will be a new dating challenge. Coincidentally years ago I thought the best way to meet a man who contacted me on a dating site was to arrange for a drive-by date.  It’s quick doesn’t require parking but only a small wave and you’re done.  All you really have to know is the make and model of each other’s car.  That sounds so much easier and less stressful than sitting with a man and after sixty seconds knowing it was the last sixty seconds you ever want to spend with him.  On many occasion I have held myself hostage to boredom and zero physical attraction in the name of civility but now those days are joyfully over. There is a certain beauty to the new dating as well as an advisable speed limit.  Driving more than 20mph won’t allow you a long enough look to know if pulling over, getting out and maintaining social distancing is a good idea.

I made the unfortunate error of joining a dating site recently and if a Corona Virus test came with the membership it would have been worth it.  This is not an opportune time to meet a man and now has my money.  I have gotten quite a few “likes” and messages from prospective dates but social distancing and the closure of everything but CVS and Walgreens sheds a new light on romance.

This is where the drive-by idea is genius as expediency is of the essence.  I can quickly assess if I want to hightail it to Walgreens/CVS for a six feet apart meet and greet. More importantly what aisle is appropriate for social distancing?  Is the Metamucil/laxative aisle too revealing for a first date?  Condoms too alluring during a pandemic?  The household disinfectant aisle will be quiet due to hoarding.  I doubt I can get a refund from which would sure help out those of us who did not predict social distancing as a dating norm.  I think if they are smart they will offer a free phone sex option for those skittish about the Walgreens/CVS meet up.

My personal preference……  “Show me the refund!”

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