Me, Ken, and GI Joe

Women need blow-up dolls too. Do they come in a male version? Bergdorfs has so many special boutiques maybe they carry them. Neimans has just about everything in their Christmas catalogue. My girlfriend mentioned the idea as an option if she were to re-marry. Hmmmmmmm. I loved dolls as a child, although not Ken or GI Joe;they had bad, bad clothes and didn't like my tea parties. But maybe clothes don't really make the man. Except pant length does. Oh God, what is worse than pants that are too short? It screams geek even at 60. My blow-up man would always have the correct length. And good shoes, another important detail. Ken, GI Joe, got Italian loafers?

Ok, I'm shallow, very, very shallow but so what? I'm digging this doll idea. Just think we'd have the same political opinions. WHAT A RELIEF THAT WOULD BE. I could take out the ear plugs and ditch the Valium. "I can't believe you would ever vote for that moron" would be replaced by "I totally agree with you". I feel calmer already. And my plastic man would be neat, no cleaning up after this guy. Wow, blow-up boy I love that you never leave dishes in the sink". "Wanna order out again"? "So do I"! Here's the best part "You have a headache"? "What a coincidence, me too"!

Blow-up boy sure is easy to get along with. He doesn't mind your nights out with the girlfriends or get mad when you come home with big bags from Bloomingdales and Saks . It's so quiet in the house with this guy. Not a peep out of him when you're reading. Anyone else interested? Perhaps girls don't outgrow dolls after all.