"YOU'RE FIRED"!

Holy crap, what if I lose my job?, There are lay-offs in every industry. I don't have an Alternate Job Plan B. Alternate Plan B is nowhere in site. But hold on just one sec, I have my own private art dealing business. At the moment that seems beside the point. I can look in the mirror one day and surprise myself by saying "you're fired"! Then what? What can I do? Nothing. Nada! Rien! I need a freaking plan. And resume. Terror strikes my heart...what would I write , "Want to buy a Picasso? Call me".

There must be something else I could do. How about Barrista? They have nice aprons and smiley faces. Free coffee would be a lovely perk. Yep, barrista could be me. Except what about short term memory loss, that's me also. Oh God, I can't remember anyone's mocha skim frothy venti , my mind is blank, the line is backed up around the block...children are crying, mother's are screaming, 6 men have missed their train and threaten to sue! "How about a nice black coffee for everyone" I yell out over the madness. I rip off my apron and run for my life. Ixnay barrista. Nanny? After all I was a mother. Except I can't help with math beyond the 3rd grade level. What if the children complain that I look older than their grandmother and that the last nanny was more fun and could play computer games. Next. How about the popcorn server at Home Depot? That doesn't look hard. Although I would look hideous in the uniform, orange is very bad with my hair color and I can't make popcorn.

Now what? Car mechanic? It sounds kinda sexy but I know nothing about car repair and don't have the right outfit. Hmmmmm. I vow not to fire myself until I can make popcorn.